A special someone

I am so bad at making decisions I will think and think and think over the smallest of things!

Just something like choosing clothes, this t shirt or that one, in the end I'll just buy both, but then which one do I wear.... Four biscuits all looking so nice but which do I eat, I know I'll just eat all four and take another of the nicest ones, it's a great guide to eating lots of biscuits! :p

The bible talks about a double minded man, a guy who asks but doubts, and can't make his mind up, it says that man will receive nothing from God...

Really I'm not that bad, I just like to be sure. I want to make sure things are Gods will for me, and that my decisions are in line with His. However sometimes I feel we have to take a step forward before God guides the next. As I've heard before God can steer a moving vehicle, but the vehicle has to be moving in the first place! Paul would sometimes plan to go to an area to preach, but God would tell Him "No not there, go here", but he didn't just sit there waiting for direction before he did anything. 

Anyway I'm rambling, and getting completely away from what the theme of this post is, or should that be who the theme is...

The thing is I like somebody, I like her alot.

More than anything I love her heart, her desire for God, and desire to please Him with her life, even when everything may look so bleak.

And I'd like to ask her out, but I'm afraid...

I'm afraid that she will say no!

I'm scared that if she said yes I wouldn't act right, or be what a boyfriend is meant to be. I've never had a girlfriend, well not since first school lol. I never really had much chance while I was ill, but I probably wouldn't have anyway. I've always believed in trusting God to find the perfect person for me, and never saw much point in dating loads of people for no real purpose. 

But now I'm worried I just wouldn't be whatever it is a boyfriend should be...

And most of all I'm scared that if things didn't work out I'd end up hurting someone that means so much to me, and end up loosing a friendship I really value.

I know if I tried to tell her all this face to face I'd only end up rambling on and totally fail at explaining myself!

I know if she did happen to say yes I'd be all I could to her, and God would be the rest